“Maybe what we say
to each other is not so important after all, but just that we are
alive together, and present for each other as best we can be.” ~Anne Lamott
I had lunch with a good friend today. This is a friend who brought me dinner the first night I was in the Treehouse and who, unfortunately, I haven't seen since. It was so wonderful catching up with her over brunch. I had to fill her in on what has happened in those two short months though, with Dan's suicide, Eric's diagnosis, medication, Virtual School, and all the other details that have just made me feel like I'm in a permanent state of overwhelmed.
But I also got to hear from her. Her partner's grandson is going to need surgery out of the state. Their granddaughter is struggling with issues at home and their daughter may lose her house. It was a good reminder to me that I'm not the only person with shit going on. And, that I still have much to be grateful about.
I think what I've been wanting and needing for a few weeks now is for someone to say--"DAMN, Christine, you've been through a lot the last year and a half. And you're really been through a lot this last year. And wow, these last few months have really been a bitch." It is that outside validation that I'm looking for--that I'm not going insane and that this stuff is real and has been intense (there's a part of me that just believes that it is just a bad Lifetime movie). And I've had friends who have said exactly that, although somehow, it still hasn't filled the hole of me needing to hear it.
No, the issues won't go away by someone acknowledging them. And sometimes I can't just find for something that will make me feel better about them. At the end of the day, I lean on my friends, I remember just HOW MUCH I have to be grateful for (and it is a lot) and I keep moving on.
And I remember that I'm not the only one.
