Every once in a while, I need to remember how far I've come. The truth is, I'm still exhausted. Actually, I just realized that the word exhausted has the word exhaust in it. Becuase that is what it feels like. I feel like we're still dealing with the exhaust from the divorce. The new living conditions, the things that fall through the cracks when kids are between homes, the pretty massive challenges that the kids have been through and the just getting used to new lives--with Robb going back to school and me staying home more. All that exhaust makes me exhausted.
But I really do need to step back and look sometimes. I had a friend recently tell me that sometimes I need to stand up on a chair (one without wheels, she recommended) and look out over everything to see the big picture and see what we've accomplished
- Robb and I have stayed friendly through all this. Really, that's amazing. Not once have we gotten to the point where we were bitter or mean.
- We've co-parented as well as we possibly could expect--the biggest testament to that is that the kids know we talk every few days and that they can't play us against each other (they've tried and have seen that it doesn't work).
- I've made the adjustments I need for the better of my family--my work has shifted dramatically to benefit both the company and my family so I can stay home more and provide some consistency and stability.
- I've set up a whole new home in a short period of time. A place that is safe, welcoming, full of crazy animals, good food and a comfy couch.
- I haven't gone insane. Really, I deserve a medal for that, right?
- I've built friendships and strengthened others. I've learned to lean on friends (and can stand to get better at it still).
- I've carried on family rituals in some cases and created new ones in others.
- I'm still earning a living. Really, I don't take that for granted.
Several medals, actually.
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