I'm a woman in transition: from being married to being single; from trying to appear perfect to trying to be vulnerable and authentic. Basically, I'm trying to love myself for who I am--for my imperfections AND my awesomeness.

I've always loved quotes and poems. They ground me and give me a topic on which to reflect. In this blog, I'll share a quote that has touched me that day and then what comes to mind when I think and feel about it.

These are my reflections as I go on my journey. As I open myself up to share them with you, I hope that they'll impact you as well and you'll share your reflections with me.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

We do not know enough to be pessimistic.

If we can recognize that change and uncertainty are basic principles, we can greet the future and the transformation we are undergoing with the understanding that we do not know enough to be pessimistic.  --Hazel Henderson

My life is so blessed.  My life is so fucked up.  How is it that both of those can co-exist at the same time? 

Really, the last 18 months have been quite difficult.  And I'm really ready for that to be all over.  My friends are ready for that to be over.  Lord knows that my children and my wasband are ready for that to be over.  I think even the dog wants it to be done.  But just wanting it doesn't make it happen.

I have been an eternal optimist.  I have a bumper sticker on my car that says "If anything can go well, it well" and I truly believe that.  I am also a big believer that what you put energy into has a life of its own: If you believe the best in people, they will show you that; if you believe good will happen, it often does.  But I'm starting to wonder.  Is it that my beliefs are wrong or is it that the more I'm looking at what is hard in my life right now is making it harder? 

Or, a third option, is it that nothing that we do really makes a difference?  No, I really don't believe that.  I believe that my thoughts DO make a difference.

My good friend Bentley wrote a poem last week and a line in it really stuck with me.  He wrote:
                                    Should I stop feigning that I am confident
                                    that what awaits is benevolent?

Exactly!

So I'm trying to figure out if I need an attitude adjustment (again), more patience until the good shows up or just acceptance that this is what it is right now.  Probably all three.  But for now, I'm going to stick with the quote at the top of this post:  I don't know enough to be pessimistic.  I will choose to be optimistic. 

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2 comments:

  1. Candy McDowallMarch 17, 2012 at 5:18 PM

    I like the way you think. And I always have.

    ReplyDelete
  2. UnknownMarch 18, 2012 at 10:51 AM

    I am wondering what you want to be over??? The drama, the relationship with Robb, things being hard, life??? This is the only life you have. I don't think there's any over... there's just different and learning and today. Don't wish it away. Lean on folks when you need support, continuing pondering the lessons being revealed, revel in the unexpected joy, love yourself and your family as hard as you can. That's all there is. There's no over until it's really over.

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